Soundtrack

Dear Jon -

You had a client, then asked me to smoke. I read into your body language and general demeanor that either the client had gone awry or you wanted to talk to me about something important. I think now, though, that you were just being polite or wanted company.

You gave me a disc with a bunch of mp3 albums on it and asked for it back. This was not what I had hoped. I had hoped when you said you were making me a disc that it would be a mix for me. Do people still do that for each other? I certainly could do it for you - there's a soundtrack to this seemingly endless cycle of longing for you.

In any case, tomorrow is Tuesday. I'll have to sit in clinical team getting a stiff neck trying not to look in your direction. And afterward we'll smoke - our ritual, as you say.

Tomorrow I'm going to try to touch you. I don't know where I'll touch you or how. But I'm going to try to touch you.

- M.